Pick of the Shops Takes Over Everything
It started innocently enough and then completely took over the show. Supermarket apps revealing your ranking as a buyer of specific items became the morning’s obsession, with Scott discovering he’s in the top 1% of instant coffee buyers locally, thanks to heroic spoon usage and a “large vessel” that is apparently just caffeine pretending to be water.
From there it escalated fast. White chocolate buttons (number 12, diet going great), peanut butter, olives, hummus, Haribo Nostalgias, sponge wipes, melons, jarred olives, Worcester sauce nationwide, and even steak and ale pies across England. Listener after listener proudly (or shamefully) announced their rankings, with acceptance speeches and mock trophies encouraged.
The mystery of Emilio’s “number two buyer” status for something was teased repeatedly and deliberately not revealed, with overnight oats and bell-ringing somehow involved. A true Gavin-and-Stacey-level fishing trip of a tease.
Coffee Quantities, Breath Concerns and Large Vessels
Scott broke down exactly how the instant coffee numbers happened: three heaped spoonfuls per mug, one jar a week, Sam not drinking coffee at all, and the revelation that nobody has ever told him if his breath is… memorable. The consensus was to say nothing and carry on.
Duck Pond Chaos
The Easiest Quiz took a brutal turn when Ryan from Alton — midlife-lycra, serial-hobbyist energy — was undone by the now-infamous question: “What do you feed at a duck pond?”
Not ducks.
Just… what you feed there.
This sparked an unexpected late-morning deep dive into modern duck-feeding etiquette, with frozen peas emerging as the approved option and bread officially cancelled. Scott now owns peas and just needs to locate some ducks.
The Easiest Quiz: Confidence Meets Reality
Ryan arrived aiming for the 30s and left with a single-digit score, his wife Kelly vindicated and calling in to confirm that yes, she laughed for a reason. The quiz continued its early-2026 reputation for psychological damage.
Morning Minute and Egg Sandwich Warnings
The Good Morning Minute rattled through birthdays, school councils, first days as teachers, dishwasher injustices, hiccups while applying false eyelashes, and a firm warning that taking egg sandwiches to work will absolutely get you a nickname.
Pause for Thought: Multitasking and the Desert
Steve Chalk delivered a reflective Pause for Thought about multitasking, impatience, and the value of slowing down — from Airfix disasters to flat-pack furniture and the importance of sharpening the axe before swinging it. Scott followed with a gentle, very on-brand reflection on boredom no longer existing and why that might not be great.
Dad Music Discourse
A surprising and oddly specific phenomenon emerged: that song that dads absolutely adore. Texts flooded in from listeners describing fathers in their 70s, 80s and even 90s declaring it the greatest record ever made, with one reportedly attempting the rap. Catnip for dads, apparently.
Fiona from The Traitors: Full Chaos, Full Disclosure
After a very clear spoiler warning (and repeated encouragement to flee to Sounds of the 90s), Scott finally welcomed “the first ever secret traitor, Fiona Boroda!” Fiona joined from Wales, where she described the morning as “very frosty and beautiful. A cold, cold, icy winter day.” It immediately set the tone for a chat that was warm, funny and completely unguarded, with Fiona admitting straight away, “This is unbelievable. I still think I’m dreaming… It’s surreal being on the radio with you.”
Talking about her time in the castle, Fiona said the experience felt far bigger than its episode count: “It was only six episodes but it felt as if I’d been there a lifetime.” She described it as “a wonderful experience” and said she’d “wholeheartedly advise anybody who loves the programme and wants to be a part of it to apply.” For her, the scale of it all only really landed afterwards, especially watching it back: “You don’t know what you’ve said… and then you watch it, probably like I did… through your fingers, thinking, ‘Oh God, what’s going to be next?’”
Fiona explained that watching the final episode was particularly chaotic, saying, “We had to watch party here… all the family were here, and they’re quite noisy and vociferous.” As a result, she admitted, “I’ve got no memory of it because all the family were here,” adding that she’s planning to sit down and properly rewatch episodes one to six once it’s all finished. “Literally, it was impossible to take it all in,” she said.
Scott picked up on fan theories about whether Fiona had been dropping hints during the show, including the now-noted red swimsuit moment. Fiona was clear: “No, it wasn’t,” explaining it was simply her being daft in the moment. She laughed as she recalled muddling Claudia Winkleman with Claudia Schiffer, saying, “I couldn’t remember her surname… and I said it too fast.” She insisted it was never intentional, adding, “I just said it to be funny, but I don’t know if it did come across that way.”
When it came to how she played the game, Fiona spoke about choosing names based on instinct rather than strategy, explaining, “When you think of Nettie, Ben and Maz, they just had ‘faithful’ written over them.” She described Nettie as “so friendly, beautiful, open-hearted,” Ben as “a veteran” who was “really clever,” and Maz as someone whose “whole aura was one of love and peace.” That gut feeling guided her decisions, summing it up simply: “That’s why their name was on the list.”
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