Beccy’s Classifieds
In Beccy’s Classifieds, Beccy searched online listings for unusual bargains, services and adverts, while Greg James read them aloud and Scott decided whether any were worth buying.
The first advert offered novelty thumbcuffs on a key ring for £1.25. Beccy already owned a pair from a Christmas cracker, but Scott suggested the new pair could solve her habit of losing her single house key by allowing her to handcuff it to her thumb.
The most striking advert came from a bride planning a 150-person wedding. Her partner had plenty of relatives nearby, but nearly all of her own family lived in Ukraine. She therefore wanted “30 decent people” to represent her at the church ceremony. Successful applicants would receive free food, dancing and a place at the reception, while volunteers were also required to act as bridesmaids, groomsmen and ushers. Applicants had to send a photograph and a short description of themselves.
Scott, Beccy and Chappers considered applying together. Beccy wanted to be a bridesmaid, Chappers could be a groomsman and Scott could serve as an usher.
Other listings included a Little Britain-style Vicky Pollard wig for £7.99; a £25 chrome-plated dance pole supplied with an instructional guide, a garter and 100 “dance dollars”; and a colour-coded best-man speech for £2. The speech seller said it lasted around ten minutes, contained roughly 1,400 words and could be personalised by changing names and removing sections.
The team concluded that the wig, speech and dance pole could all be taken to the stranger’s wedding to create a complete evening’s entertainment.
Oh, What’s Occurring?
In Oh, What’s Occurring?, Scott played incomplete clips or set up unusual challenges and asked Beccy and Chappers to predict the result before revealing what actually happened.
The first round concerned a major technical failure during Greg James’s early-morning programme. Studio buttons, microphones and music systems stopped responding, while Greg discovered that microphones remained live even when apparently switched off. He filled the silence with the Murder, She Wrote theme and eventually moved into another studio. The problem lasted two minutes and 46 seconds, making Beccy’s two-minute prediction the closest.
The second round counted the amount of time Kate Winslet spent making gasps, sobs and incomplete noises during a Golden Globes acceptance speech. The total was 35 seconds.
The final challenge involved Chris Moyles bobbing for pickled onions in a bowl that also contained pickled eggs. He had one minute, could not use his hands and received no point for an egg. Moyles retrieved one onion and one egg before stopping because of the vinegar in his eyes and mouth. Only the onion counted, giving him a final score of one and Beccy the winning prediction.
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