A champion and a child’s bike
Geraint Thomas arrived in Team Sky clothing with his own racing bike for Innuendo Bingo. Chris had expected something similar but discovered a tiny bicycle with stabilisers and a bell. He sat so far below Geraint that he could barely spray upwards, while the Olympic champion had a perfect height advantage.
Geraint had previously tried a homemade version of the game with his mother-in-law in Thailand, but this was his first official appearance. Clips included an old cartoon featuring a woman with an enormous mouth, Formula 1 discussion of a clear visor on a wet helmet, Anna Kendrick double-fisting cocktails and Tour de France skid marks.
Further material covered Caroline Martin accidentally reading a listener’s reference to Chris Stark’s purple lightsaber, an Apprentice winner learning a Japanese toast, somebody who had never touched the ball and a curler sitting on a Canadian opponent’s face. Geraint repeatedly soaked Chris from above and controlled the contest so completely that Scott urged Chris to fight back in the final clip. The professional cyclist still owned the game, leaving the smaller bicycle looking like a parent taking a child on his first ride.
Jason Derulo reaches the note
Scott had woken during the night worrying whether Jason Derulo could reproduce the high notes in Cheyenne during a Live Lounge. The concern made little sense to Chris, but Scott felt responsible for the whole station’s performances.
Derulo completed the song successfully, although Scott suspected the band had added enough bass and support to disguise the hardest moment. Justin Bieber’s Breakfast interview also supplied a lesson in selfies: raised eyebrows and slightly narrowed eyes produced Bieber’s expression, while going any further created Zoolander.
A supposedly impossible blind date
Kristian was being set up with a Swedish woman called Joni at a Halloween masked ball in Cornwall. Friends described her as wealthy, resembling a Victoria’s Secret model and massively out of his league. Kristian described himself as closer to Michael McIntyre and thought a tan might give him confidence.
Scott strongly advised against home application. A professional spray from a person with a gun was safer than a booth or bottle, particularly when Kristian had previously turned only his hands orange. The Halloween theme offered an escape if the colour became too dark, but Scott rejected the idea that anybody was objectively outside his league and asked for an update after the party.
Charlie Sloth played Real or No Real. An American station called Doomed genuinely broadcast Halloween music throughout the year. Gareth Bale had been known to eat beans on toast before matches, and shoppers in Plymouth really had covered early festive adverts in wrapping paper as a protest. Charlie won despite repeatedly becoming distracted by his own snacks, gigs and possible Christmas present.
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