A thoroughly Rubbish Monday
The Oscars have announced the wrong Best Picture winner after receiving the wrong envelope, but Scott and Chris feel particular sympathy because their own awards night also collapsed. They hosted the British Kebab Awards on Sunday, where they declared a runner-up the winner, confused two shops whose names differed by one letter, lost the microphones and found themselves without the video screen listing nominees.
A waiter had tripped over a cable, walk-on music disappeared and, when it returned, two songs played together. At one point both presenters simply screamed. Scott names the day “Rubbish Monday” as listeners contribute smaller disasters and a Radio 2 newsreader stumbles over “administrative cock-up.” The kebab ceremony recovered, but its description as a “series of glitches” feels charitable.
Sporting heavyweights play Story Trumps
Freddie Flintoff, Robbie Savage and Matthew Syed join from Manchester, where they are recording their Flintoff, Savage and the Ping Pong Guy podcast. Scott immediately reduces the twice-published table-tennis Olympian to “the ping pong guy,” while the trio describe their mixture of sporting analysis, intellect and arguments about Robbie’s body.
They play Story Trumps, each offering an extraordinary celebrity encounter. Matthew has the brains, Robbie has years of football tales, and Freddie is held back until last because everybody suspects he can beat them.
“Y’alright, Steve?”
Freddie’s story begins at one of Jimmy Carr’s parties, attended by Andrew Lloyd Webber, Nigella Lawson and numerous famous guests. Jimmy invites Freddie into the kitchen to do tequila shots with Steve. Freddie expects an ordinary friend; “Steve” is Stephen Hawking.
The shock leaves him unable to produce a suitably intelligent greeting. While Jimmy signals that he must say something, Freddie leans over, raises his thumb and offers, “Y’alright, Steve?” Hawking knowing his name makes the moment even more overwhelming. The meeting of minds wins comfortably, and Freddie hints that he still has a Desmond Tutu story available. After the Oscars and kebab fiascos, the day finds its flawless award result at last.
—
COMMENTS