Chappers claims to be reporting live from Old Trafford cricket ground in Manchester for the England vs New Zealand Twenty20 match, but the team is deeply sceptical of his story — especially when suspicious background sounds emerge. Meanwhile, Lloyd returns with more football facts, and there’s another hilarious Barryoke performance.
The episode opens with Chappers insisting he’s at Old Trafford cricket ground in a cupboard with a window to watch and report on the Twenty20 international. Scott and the team interrogate his claim with increasing doubt, particularly when Chappers plays what sounds suspiciously like The Sisters of Mercy in the background and claims the England players are dancing to it during field practice. He maintains he can see players like Kevin Pietersen warming up, but the team remains unconvinced that he’s actually there.
The show then shifts to a follow-up with Darren, a listener who appeared on a recent episode of Come Dine with Me and was nervous about how his flirting with three female contestants would come across on air. Clips are played back showing Darren’s charm offensive, complete with card tricks and compliments, which left him anxiously hiding at a friend’s house before returning home to face his fiancée. He explains it all worked out fine, and she saw the humour in his performance.
Lloyd returns as the team’s self-appointed football expert with facts about the day’s Euro 2008 matches. For Romania vs Italy, Lloyd enthusiastically backs Italy (naturally, as it’s his team) and offers increasingly absurd “facts”: Italian dog discos where owners take their pets to dance, footballer Andrea Pirlo’s Italian-sounding name, and invented claims about Romania being known for water polo. For Holland vs France, he rattles off facts about Dutch people, bicycles with no brakes (requiring backward pedaling to stop), a “Dutch Uncle,” and France’s 365 different cheeses — one for every day of the year. His “facts” are patchy at best, but delivered with complete confidence.
The episode closes with another Barryoke performance, this time from Barry, an operations director from Peckham, and his backing vocalist Janette. They perform a medley based on “Pretty Fly (for a White Guy)” by The Offspring, transformed into “Pretty Fly for Barry” — with lyrics rewritten to celebrate Barry’s name throughout.
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