Looking famous without being recognised
Scott and Chris returned from what they considered the best Radio 1 Teen Awards yet. Five Seconds of Summer had closed the show, although Michael Clifford’s accidental fall from the stage left him on crutches. Aaron received his Teen Hero award from Scott, Chris and You Me at Six, then watched a message in which Sam Smith invited him round for tea.
The team’s experiment with Chris had also worked. They dressed him in white, added a hat and enormous glasses, then sent him onto the carpet surrounded by security. Teenagers and photographers assumed he must be important even though many could not identify him. The glasses looked closer to ski goggles than celebrity shades, but the confidence and entourage supplied the missing fame.
What everybody loves except you
One of Scott’s friends hated Disney, which seemed to challenge the idea that its films were universally comforting. Listeners quickly supplied other popular things they could not tolerate. Becky disliked cake, including expensive chocolate cake, while messages rejected familiar foods, films and activities that their friends treated as unquestionable pleasures.
Scott refused to accept some answers and began arguing on behalf of the supposedly universal favourites. The feature therefore became less about respecting unpopular opinions and more about discovering which objections he considered personally offensive.
Kristian’s successful masked date
Kristian returned after the Halloween date with the woman he had described as rich, Swedish and far outside his league. She was actually Dutch and had heard his original radio appearance, disliking the “rich” description while accepting the compliment about being attractive.
He abandoned the planned spray tan and went dressed as Batman. She arrived independently in a related costume, and a friend acted as an unexpectedly effective wingwoman during the evening. Kristian’s pessimism proved unnecessary: the date went well, and his supposedly impossible match was willing to see him again.
Greg James played Real or No Real. Kanye West really was reported to spend $500 a day having his hair cut, an annual cost that made an ordinary head shave sound like stadium maintenance. A supermarket also genuinely advertised for somebody to untangle customers’ Christmas lights, giving Scott a seasonal job he could understand immediately.
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